Wedding season is upon us. Many young women are proudly showing off their beautiful engagement rings and beginning their wedding preparations. It is a time of excitement for brides-to-be, their mothers, and if they’re fortunate enough to still have their grandmothers present, exciting for them as well. For many though, their grandmothers have passed on and it often leaves a void. Many years of wisdom from grandmothers could be shared and unfortunately won’t be.
For this reason, I want to be sure my granddaughter has tidbits of wisdom tucked into her heart, from my heart, before she walks down the aisle. I want her to know, even if I am not there with her physically, that my spirit and the moments of marriage I pass onto her will be remembered for always.
I wrote this love letter to my two-year-old granddaughter Hannah, in hopes I will still be here when her time comes to marry. My wish is to verbally tell her matters of the heart in regard to marriage, but just in case I can’t, she will have this memento of my thoughts which is tucked away in a keepsake box.
A letter to my granddaughter
Dear Hannah,
As you begin the journey of marriage, there are going to be moments that will never cross your mind until you come face to face with them. My sweet girl, these moments are a part of marriage. None of us are ever truly prepared for all marriage may bring. My gift to you are my words of wisdom which hopefully you will bury deep within and take hold of when you need them most. From this day forward it is not about the wedding, it is all about the marriage.
Moments of Happiness: On your honeymoon you will experience a fairy tale. It’s absolutely essential. Embrace it, enjoy it, cherish it. Reality will set in soon enough; as early as when you walk through your new home with your husband. Real life will begin. Happiness is an emotion, my darling, it will come and it will go. Your husband is not responsible for your happiness; you are!
Moments of Sadness: Along with the happy moments there will be sad ones too. To shield each other from sadness means you lose the opportunity to trust God. He gives and He takes away and there will be moments where you will not understand why He allows circumstances to come into your lives which cause such sadness. Always trust that He is in control and accept the sadness. It will pass.
Moments of Discontent: This too is fleeting. Yet when in the midst of it, it can wreck havoc on a relationship. Wanting something so badly that it becomes a necessity when it may not be in the best interest of your relationship will bring discontent. Find thankfulness in all seasons of your marriage.
Moments of Discouragement: They will come for both of you. Be there to lift one another up and ease each other’s burdens. It is the daily things you do for one another that can help take the sting out of discouragement.
Moments of Counsel & Support: Provide wise counsel when needed. You are your husband’s helpmate. Use discernment in knowing when you need to listen without giving advice. Support your husband’s decisions even if you know they may bring consequences. A man wants respect above all else.
Moments of Space: Honor the need for personal time away from each other. It does not mean he doesn’t want to spend time with you, it means he needs his own time too. Same goes for you, especially when you have children.
Moments of Affirmation: During stressful times, a man needs affirmation. You will too. Never be afraid to ask for what you need.
Moments of Prayer/Meditation: Establish early in your relationship a time for prayer, meditation or devotions – lifting yourselves up, one another and praying together when needed. There is nothing you both can’t overcome if you give it over to your higher power.
Moments of Forgiveness: Marriage is sacrifice. There will be disagreements and you won’t always feel like forgiving. Without forgiveness, bitterness and resentment will set in. Try not to hold grudges and learn to let go. Forgiveness is essential in a marriage.
My sweet girl, laugh often, have a forgiving spirit and love always in the wonderful journey of marriage.
All My Love,
Grammie
Photo Credits: Dani
