Keeping The Romance Alive After Kids

Keeping The Romance Alive After Kids 1 Daily Mom, Magazine For Families

Once you become a parent, your primary focus shifts from your spouse or significant other to your children. Gone are the days of spontaneous, drawn out date nights and hours of privacy. While having children can form a new, deep bond in a relationship, it can also send romance to the back burner. You need to realize that it is going to take some work on your part to keep the spark flying between you and your partner. Here are six tips to help amp up the romance in your relationship.

Schedule Time Together

Just because you don’t have time for a fancy date night doesn’t mean that you and your partner can’t spend alone time together. Life often gets in the way (dinner, bedtime routines, personal activities, TV watching, chores), so it is important that you plan your time together. Set aside one night each week where you enjoy quality one-on-one time with your significant other after the kids are in bed with no distractions. What you do together is completely up to you.

Flirt Throughout The Day

Remember those early days of your relationship when you couldn’t stop thinking about each other and you would do whatever you could to be in contact with that other person throughout the day? Well, why not make an effort to return to those days of unabashed flirting. Text your partner sexy messages or love notes throughout the day. Write them an email professing your love. And if you’re spending the day together, whisper sweet nothings in your lover’s ear and build up anticipation for alone time after the kids are asleep.

Keeping The Romance Alive After Kids 2 Daily Mom, Magazine For Families

Write Love Letters

Maybe your spouse isn’t a romantic, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be! Leave them love notes on a regular basis. Hide them in the pocket of their pants, in their lunch bag, or post them on the fridge. With so much love coming their way, how can they not return it? Reminding your partner of your love on a regular basis (and inspiring them to do the same) is crucial to maintaining the romance in your relationship.

Get Touchy-Feely

While a deep, loving bond is a key ingredient to a romantic relationship, let’s face it, physical contact is just as important. With busy schedules and kids always at your feet, you may not make as much of an effort to physically connect with your significant other throughout the day. Make it a priority to kiss them goodbye whenever they leave. And make it a long, deep kiss! Hold hands or cuddle when you’re watching TV together. Pinch their behind when you’re walking by in the kitchen. And remember that it is also beneficial for your children to see your love for each other. Don’t be afraid to show your love in front of them (in an appropriate way, of course).

Keeping The Romance Alive After Kids 3 Daily Mom, Magazine For Families

Surprise Your Significant Other

Who doesn’t love surprises? And what better way to show your significant other how much you care (and inspire some romance in return) than a special surprise! You could send them a gift at work, surprise them with a date night out, give them a late night massage, or even let them have a day off to do whatever they want. Showing your appreciation is a great way to get appreciation in return and will remind your partner why they fell in love with you in the first place. Romantic sparks are sure to fly!

Enjoy Late Night Dates at Home

Babysitters can get expensive, as well as nights out on the town. Avoid the hassle and re-spark the romance in your relationship with pre-planned date nights at home! Go about your regular evening routines and once the kids are asleep, the night is yours. Here are some ideas to get you started…

Five In-Home Date Night Ideas

  • Play cards or board games
  • Take a bath or shower together
  • Curl up on the couch with a movie and a bowl of popcorn
  • Cook a fancy dessert together
  • Enjoy an indoor picnic with wine and cheese
If you found this article helpful, check out NURTURE and THRIVE for more great tips.

Photo Credit: The Art of Making a Baby



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Ariel is a working mom of two (expecting baby #3 next July!) who is married to her high school sweetheart. When she isn’t at the office or playing with her young kiddos, you can find her writing on her personal blog, Dreams To Do. Ariel is a lover of inspirational words, photography, coffee, reality TV, and of course, her family. You can connect with Ariel on Twitter and Facebook.