35 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes Bring Miles of Smiles For Your Little Ones

Show love to your children by sharing Valentine’s Day jokes. Laugh, giggle, and smile as you tickle their funny bone. Let your hair down and get silly with your children as you shower them with humor and not just candy hearts. After all, how do your children know that you love them? Because they stole a “pizza” your heart.

35 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes Bring Miles Of Smiles For Your Little Ones

The innocence of Valentine’s Day jokes for children will keep the whole family laughing, or at least smiling. Helping your children enjoy a good sense of humor helps them enjoy life as they grow and develop. When I was growing up, there were only 25 letters in the alphabet. Nobody knew why. Laugh, smile, snicker, and giggle as you enjoy Valentine’s Day together as a family.

Animal Valentine’s Day Jokes

Just about everyone loves animals. It’s so cute, to see animals “cuddle and snuggle” like people. That’s why writers anthropomorphize animals (give animals human qualities) in stories. That’s why children imagine and dream that their stuffed animals and plastic animal figurines come to life. So, let’s picture the animals celebrating their love on Valentine’s Day.

35 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes Bring Miles Of Smiles For Your Little Ones

What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts.

What did the one sheep say to the other? I love ewe!

What did one snake say to the other snake on Valentine’s Day? Give me a little hug and a hiss, honey.

Read More: Finding A Family Pet: Animals That Are A Great Fit And Ones To Avoid

What was the French cat’s favorite Valentine’s Day dessert? Chocolate mousse.

What did the octopus say to his date? Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?

What do squirrels give for Valentine’s Day? Forget-me-nuts.

35 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes Bring Miles Of Smiles For Your Little Ones

Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day? Yes, they’re very scent-imental!

What did the cat say to her date on Valentine’s Day? You’re purrr-fect for me.

What did the rabbit say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day? Somebunny loves you.

What did the bee say to the Queen bee on Valentine’s Day? You are bee-autiful!

What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouchy, mama!

What do you call two spiders that just got married? Newly-webs.

Valentine’s Day Jokes About Candy

35 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes Bring Miles Of Smiles For Your Little Ones

What kind of Valentine’s Day candy is never on time? ChocoLATE

What Valentine’s Day candy is only for girls? HER-SHE’s Kisses.

What do you call candy that was stolen? Hot chocolate.

What is a happy farmer’s favorite candy to give his Valentine? A Jolly Rancher.

What’s a veterinarian’s favorite candy on Valentine’s Day? A KitKat.

Valentine’s Day Food Jokes

What did one raspberry say to the other on Valentine’s Day? I love you berry much.

What did the pickle say to the other pickle on Valentine’s Day? You mean a great dill to me.

Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable? Because it’s got a heart.

Read More: 5 Types of Indian Flatbread with Easy Recipes to Try at Home Tonight

What did Forrest Gump say to his bowl of pasta? “I love you, Penne!”

What do you call it when two chips fall in love? A relation-dip.

My Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes

35 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes Bring Miles Of Smiles For Your Little Ones

Why did the man send his wife’s Valentine through Twitter? Because she is his tweetheart.

What did cavemen give their wives on Valentine’s Day? Lots of ughs and kisses.

Read More: Astrological Signs of the Zodiac and What They “Meme”

What did the drum say to the other drum on Valentine’s Day? My heart beats for you.

What did the light bulb say to the other light bulb on Valentine’s Day? I love you a watt.

How do you impress a baker when you’re taking his daughter on a date? Bring her flours.

Valentine’s Day Jokes for Those Who Love Math

What did the calculator say to the pencil on Valentine’s Day? You can always count on me.

What did the circle say to the triangle on Valentine’s Day? I think you’re acute.

My love for you is like dividing by zero… It can’t be defined.

My love is like a fractal… It goes on forever.

I know you like adding numbers… So could you please add yours to my contacts?


Create a new Valentine’s Day tradition with your children or spouse this year. Drop a note with Valentine’s Day jokes in their lunch box or backpack from the first day of February until Feb. 14. Show your children both big and small that you love them by bringing a smile to their day. After all, remember, what happened when the two vampires went on a blind date? It was love at first bite.

Compiled From: Funkidsjokes.com; Squigly’s Jokes, and Riddles; Best Life Online; and Food Jokes.

Photo Credits: Unsplash, Pexels

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Carla J. Eskew
Carla J. Eskew is a freelance writer, wife, and mom of two children who are nine years apart. She is a Scout leader with 15 years of experience in Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts. She serves as a volunteer at school, church, and with the homeless population. She loves road trips, sightseeing, camping, and pilates. But, her new love is her 1-year-old black standard poodle puppy, Midnight Shadow.

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