Talking about marriage is one of those things that people either love or hate. If you’re in a good marriage, you may be more inclined to talk about it than if you’re in a bad marriage. But one thing that often gets left out of our marriage conversations is how hard marriage can be. Talking about marriage should include ups and downs. The goods and the bads. The pros and cons.
Marriage is meant to be a long-term commitment. One where you pledge to stand by each other’s side through thick and thin, but the steady divorce rate is a clear indication that people are not talking about marriage enough to keep them committed in their marriage.
While the reasons behind separations and divorces are often highlighted in many discussions across media platforms, the discussion behind the beauty of marriage and the many beautiful reasons to stay married are talked about less.
Marriage is not easy, and there will be troubling and difficult times, but there are so many reasons to hold on to the life-long commitment you made when you married. So, let’s spend some time talking about marriage, and how it can help you stay married.
10 Things Talking about Marriage Reminds You Of
You and your spouse have been through the same ups and downs and the time spent together has created a bond that is irreplaceable. You truly do not have this kind of relationship with another person. The value in the history that has been created has made you and your spouse the people you are today, so it’s important to keep that bond intact.
There will be times when you are not feeling loved at a particular moment, but it does not mean that love has faded for good. Love is one of the biggest reasons for you to stay married. The love that you had for your spouse will likely return even after being absent for a little while.
While building the foundation for your marriage, despite going through the likely ups and downs, you have built a platform strong enough to support the family for years to come. You have worked hard to persevere and grow upon your marriage, so unless you want all those years of effort and hard work to go to waste, then you surely want to see your marriage continue and in turn, prosper well into the future.
You have had years now to discover each other’s strengths and weaknesses because you are familiar with each other. The likelihood of someone else knowing a lot of these things is slim to none. There is a certain intimacy that familiarity with each other has created that is so powerful, and because of this, it creates a bond that is hard to break.
It’s important for each spouse to understand and accept the fact that there will be good times, there will be bad times, and there will be ugly times. To hold high, unrealistic expectations upon getting married that everything will be perfect and then watching those expectations crash down around you is no one’s fault but your own. Ask yourself whether the good times outweigh the bad (or the ugly). If they don’t, make a conscious effort to make the marriage work by seeking help in whatever positive way you can.
The responsibility of giving your children a loving and understanding family falls onto your shoulders as soon as you bring them into the world. Even with differences that may arise during the marriage, it’s important to show your children what commitment, love, and compromise in a marriage is all about. Your children will learn what a good marriage looks like by watching your marriage. This is why talking about marriage with them is a great way to lay a foundation.
The greatest accomplishments in life come from overcoming great challenges. Marriage is challenging in itself, but when you throw in the curve-balls life decides to throw along the way, it only adds to the challenge. The satisfaction and sense of accomplishment upon making the marriage work despite those challenges is both rewarding and creates a sense of triumph.
You know the saying, “Opposites attract?” There is much truth to that statement because it’s the similarities and differences between you and your spouse that brought you together in the first place. It’s those differences and how you both decide to work through them and overcome them that makes you that much stronger as a couple. Choose to work together through those differences, rather than letting it create a thorn between you and your spouse.
Your spouse may not be perfect, but neither are you. You both are no strangers to each other’s flaws. Everyone has flaws and if you were to jump ship from your marriage, the next person you meet and become romantically linked to will have their own flaws. You are already familiar with your spouse’s flaws, so why would you put yourself through learning and possibly accepting new flaws in someone else?
You made a vow when you got married. You committed to spending the rest of your days with your spouse, through thick and thin, through the good and the bad, and everything in between. It’s that commitment that can allow a married couple to overcome anything.
Discussions about your marriage should be had frequently. Communicating your expectations for your marriage is key, especially when facing new seasons or trials. Your relationship is something you have been able to focus on and devote time and energy to for years, and it can be a glorious thing to look back on in a few decades. Talking about marriage, both with your spouse, your children, and your friends can truly make all the difference.
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