No one admits it. Everyone seems to deny it. Yet, we all have one. The favorite kid. Whether you have one or going on 10 like we do, there’s a favorite. Sure, we flat out lie to them and say we don’t have a favorite, but if I’m going to mom-up and shave the side of my head, the least I can do is be honest: Yes...I tend to favor a kid here and there and I don’t even feel bad about it. Why, do you?
Okay, let’s get Webster for a moment… according to Merriam, she says that one of the definitions of favorite is: noun: a person or thing that is especially popular or particularly well liked by someone. This matches perfectly with my favorite kid. I like them. They are popular to me. I mean, every day I get to call their name, be around them, and even swoon a little bit as if I was spending the day with Justin Bieber or Taylor Swift! This is a neat little kid I got!
Let’s sit and ponder this for a moment. I’ve got 9 distinct personalities manifesting themselves every single day in my home. Do you really believe my favorite stays constant?!? Oh h*ll no!
They’ll turn on you as quick as the 2-year-old will pull off a diaper and squeal away in a free, chunky-butt-waddle run across the kitchen.
I could have a favorite for the two hours we sit and just mesh well together. However, later that evening, another may roll in and “over-mesh” their connection with me and guess what…
A new “favorite”.
Having a favorite is all about recognizing, appreciating, and taking notice of each person’s unique attitude, personality, humor (or lack thereof), and their character traits. There are honest times that I just don’t like to spend my whole day with a particular child. Our personalities clash and I’m okay with that. They’re not my “favorite”.
I can be content and a loving parent without bending over backward trying to force an awkward relationship with someone I normally wouldn’t naturally gravitate towards...even if it’s my own kid.
Love isn’t the issue.
Just because you carried a human being in your womb for 9+ months doesn’t automatically mean you’re destined to be besties for the rest of your lives. My ‘favorite’ may change from day to day but I tend to relate really well with 1-3 kids better than I relate to the others. That’s just fact (for me anyway). It’s not leaving anyone out, treating them differently, or loving them any less.
So yeah, I have a favorite 13-year-old (and no, I don’t have twins) that year. I may have a ‘favorite’ daughter out of the current four I have. I may have two favorite sons out of the 5 I have. I have favorite personalities I like to be around more than others.
The dictionary may have its own definition of "favorite" that is closely related to how I feel about a certain child/individual, but all in all, truth be told, I do have a couple favorite kids.
We just “mesh” well together with our personalities, likes and dislikes, and connections on a deeper level. We have popular interests and our similarities are well-liked by the both of us. So yeah, I have a favorite kid(s), moment to moment - some longer than others!
Photo Credits: AndiL.